TransParentcy is a unique support group where Trans and gender expansive youth ages 13-21 meet in one room and parents/caregivers meet in another so everyone has an opportunity to discuss topics with their peers. TransParentcy+ groups are often smaller, focus on a more specific audience, and can be short term. So far we’ve hosted a TransParentcy+ group tailored to underserved towns in Westchester and a special group for BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People of Color) youth and parents. Youth can come to any TransParentcy group without an adult and vice versa. To learn more about TransParentcy, expand the content below.
TransParentcy is Westchester County’s only group for Transgender and gender creative 13-21 year olds and their parents/caregivers. The youth group meets every week and the guardian group meets on the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays of the month from 6:30-8:30pm (see current schedule here)
Youth and adult groups begin together for welcome and announcements, then meet separately with trained facilitators. Youth may come without an adult and adults can come without kids. The youth group is for you if you are 13-21 and identify as Trans, Non-Binary, Agender, Gender Queer, Gender Fluid or are thinking about gender in ways that are creative and want to talk about it.
Topics for both groups come from you and give people a chance to:
- Find support to navigate challenges and celebrate successes as you journey through being or raising a Trans or gender non-conforming youth
- Meet others who can relate to your experiences and build community in a safe setting that affirms all gender identities, expressions, and paths
- Share resources, experiences, and knowledge with each other
- Explore concepts around gender identity and expression, and expand your thinking about issues that affect the Trans community including: issues related to social, medical, and legal transition, healthcare, school and institutional policies and practices, and the coming-out process
Center Lane has conducted written evaluations twice per year since 2017. Here’s what the Youth have reported…
- 97% said they’ve learned something new about the LGBTQ+ community from Center Lane.
- 92% said that as a result of TransParentcy, they’ve learned more about themselves as a Trans person.
- 95% said TransParentcy taught them new ways to be more affirming of all sexual orientations and gender identities.
- 97% say they better understand what transitioning means for a Trans person.
- 98% say Center Lane is a good place to find an LGBTQ+ community.
- 100% say they feel more confident as a Trans person after coming to TransParentcy.
- 98% report feeling more connected to the Trans community.
- 100% say they understand more the diversity of the LGBTQ+ community.
- 98% agree that adults at Center Lane care about them.
When asked what they liked or learned at Center Lane, Youth said:
- To be myself unapologetically
- A trans exclusive space where I can be my best gay self
- I made friends, I’m a person
- In my transition that I need patience
- It is great to be around fellow Trans people and learn that there are youth my age that are going through the same thing that I am
- That everyone transitions differently. Even if two people share the same identity, their transitions can look very different.
- That I can be myself safely with the right people
- That my voice matters
- The feeling of connection that I get with everyone in the group, it feels like a small found family
- The sense of community and the ability to talk about black issues with other POC
- There is a long process ahead that I’m willing to take
- I love talking to other trans people and hearing about their experiences and just helping each other out. I love that I can do that at transparentcy and make friends doing it.
Parents and Caregivers who have been to TransParentcy report…
- 97% Strongly Agreed they learned something new about the LGBTQ+ Community from Center Lane.
- 96% said they learned more about themselves as a parent of a Trans youth.
- 97% said they were taught new ways to be more affirming of all sexual orientations and gender identities.
- 99% Strongly Agreed they have a better understanding of what transitioning means for a Trans person.
- 98% said they have gained practical ways to support their Trans child.
- 99% Strongly Agreed the staff at Center Lane care about them and their child.
- 96% Strongly Agreed that after coming to TransParentcy, they feel more confident parenting a Trans youth.
- 96% said they better understand the diversity of the LGBTQ+ community.
When asked what they liked or learned at Center Lane, Adults said:
- What I feared when I came was that I would have ideas pushed on me but my own transition as a trans mom was treated with great respect. By talking out my fears I have been able to receive my kid with love and acceptance
- The support offered to parents at all stages of their kids’ transitions. The resources provided are invaluable.
- Very informative staff + parents. Have learned a lot. Helped overcome initial anxiety w/ son coming out.
- I liked being able to speak to other parents/adults like myself who have a trans child. Also like the youth get to hang out and speak to each other too!
- The opportunity to share/ ask questions/ get support in a caring environment with people who are going through or have gone through a similar experience.
- I’ve learned how to support my child through transition. I am not alone
- My feeling are OK. It feels great to be surrounded by parents that can teach me the ropes
- The understanding non-judgemental way we can talk and learn from each other
- Very calming and source of hope.
- Its ok to be freaked out while learning and supporting
- I’ve learned that I have the tools to be a parent of a trans youth.
- I am not alone and that there is a knowledgeable, supporting, and caring community at my disposal.
Can I come alone?
- Definitely! Sometimes youth attend without parents, sometimes parents attend without kids – both are fine. Of course, it’s great to go to TransParentcy together, too.
What if I’m 12 or younger?
- There are options for you. If you haven’t had your 13th birthday, talk to us! Send an email to [email protected] or call (914) 423-0610 and we’ll see how we can help.
What if I’m not “out”?
- We take confidentiality VERY seriously. No one will ask you your identity, and no one will tell anyone else you attended TransParentcy (or any other Center Lane Program). There is no requirement for parent permission.
What if I’m not sure whether I’m Trans?
- Welcome home to Center Lane! However you’re feeling about your gender, TransParentcy is a great place to figure stuff out with the help of our facilitators and the other youth in the group – many of whom have had the same questions!
What if I’m 22 or over?
- If you are 22 or older, talk to us! Send an email to [email protected] or call (914) 423-0610 and we’ll see how we can help!
What is TransParentcy like?
- First the adults and youth meet together for a few minutes for welcome and announcements. After they split up with parents in one room and kids in the other, Facilitators read the group agreement and everyone introduces themselves using their name, age (or kid’s age for adults), and pronouns. They also share whether they have a topic to discuss that night (you don’t have to have one!) and maybe answer a fun ‘check-in’ question. The Facilitators then call on people who have had topics. You can ask a question, share a situation you’re dealing with or ask for advice with a problem. Then you get to call on anyone who wants to help or offer support. It’s that easy!
Do I have to talk?
- Nope – Center Lane always gives you a choice! It’s great to at least check in and we love it when people have their cameras on, but the most important thing is for you to be comfortable.
What name do I have to give?
- You tell us the name and pronouns you would like us to use that night. It’s fine if it’s not your legal name or changes.
How much does it cost?
- TransParentcy is FREE!
What if someone says something I don’t like or upsets me?
- We have a group agreement to help keep everyone safe in the room, but we all have different ways to be safe. There are usually two adult Facilitators in the youth room, including Center Lane’s social worker. If things get too intense or something touches a sore spot for you, let them know and they’ll find a space to talk to you about what’s bothering you.
What if I see someone I know there?
- That doesn’t happen very often, but if it does, you know that you are both there for the same reason – you are having feelings or questions about gender identity, and are looking for support and community. Confidentiality is crucial, and we need to trust that you won’t share their information outside of group and they won’t share yours – it’s part of our group agreement!